I was really excited to see so many people show up. I wish I had finished something to share with them. I have been trying to put together something of a cut up but for all of the times I started over I couldn't create something adequte. I'll keep working on it and post it here before next week, even if I still don't feel like it works.
What I keep struggling with is creating something original and personal but in the beat mentality and with the vision we've been learning about. I wanted to do some photography but the photos I took seemed mediocre and uninteresting. I wanted to put some beat-ish music together in a montage with some photos but when I put it together with some Beat photography it had no me in it, and when I put it with my photos it had hardly any beat in it. I am actually pretty upset that I wasn't able to be creative the way I wanted to be and synthesize my new knowledge of the Beat mentality with my personal creativity and expression. I want so badly to express myself but have little practice doing so and the whole thing seems so inadequte to me. Maybe I should try poetry. I used to write poetry. I'm going to write a poem.
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